sometimes it shows up at your doorstep with roses and sometimes it leaves you standing on the altar alone. maybe is like russian roulette. you’re faith in it is dangerous. you believe that it’ll turn into a yes, and you think about it. you watch it. morphing like a butterfly before your eyes. the instinctive face twitch that you read into just a little too much. or the roll of the eyes when you see it heading the other direction. & maybe is so helpless. you can’t control it. even when you want to. it’s the worst feeling in the world. hanging in limbo between what you want and what you fear. the question then becomes… instead of letting maybe control you, do you force it to change? do you spin the cylinder, put the gun to you head and pull the trigger? because if you do, it changes everything.